The American Dream: A Split Second Lifestyle

Today my family ate at the dinner table per my mom’s request.

Shocker! Right? No? Okay.

Let me explain:

As a kid, I was raised by my grandma and my single mother. Every night we would eat dinner with my grandma’s current husband also. It was a very small house, but the amount of land my family owned on the property partially made up for it. Until my mother got married to my current stepdad, I shared a bedroom with my mom. A 10 x 10 room with a teenager isn’t a good situation to be in on either side of the problem. We weren’t the typical American family, but really who is?

Whenever we moved into my stepdad’s house I got my own room. This was one of the only perks provided to me in dealing with living with him for the past 3 years. Since we moved into the house my mom has this visual of the American dream. Let me tell you from my own experience, it doesn’t last very long. My mom hasn’t had a job in around 7 years, so her first resort was to be a homemaker. In no way am I criticizing that, though. She does more daily than I could ever do. Her second step into this American dream ideal was to generally become the perfect housewife. That’s when I realized she went a bit mental.

Skipping forward to Sunday, my step-grandmother’s birthday:

My mom suggested we sit at the table like we usually do for big holidays or birthday parties. I understand why she wanted to do this, and I was completely fine with it. That is, until I realized I’d have to socialize with a couple of members of my step-family. My step-grandma is a very religious woman. She’s a holiness pentecostal woman, and if that doesn’t tell you enough about her then I don’t know what will. (If you’ve never heard of the denomination of the Christian faith, let me explain: she believes that women shouldn’t cut thier hair, wear pants, or wear makeup. She believes in speaking in foreign tongues and the holy ghost. Lastly, and most irritating of all in my opinion, she thinks that wives should submit to their husbands.)

She soon began to drone on and on about how a woman experienced a medical miracle, and how the son of a bitch (in my own words) doctor became a holy vessel of God and began praising His name.

All the while this was going on, my stepdad was existing. I can’t tell you how much I despise him, honestly. On a side note, just to explain how douchey he is, he just sat there while my mom struggled in picking up a humongous weed-eater. Keep in mind that my mom has shoulder problems and could have inflamed it worse.

Maybe this isn’t the American dream she thought she was getting into after all.

A Brief Backstory

First of all, let me give a HUGE thank you to the people who have liked or commented on my last post. You have no idea how good it makes me feel to have someone reading these. The amount of support that you all have shown me in only the past 24 hours has given me hope and brightened my week. In honor of the first five blog posts I’ve done, I’m going to be completely real and honest here. No censorship or lies on this blog. I’ll be telling you guys the whole truth, and hopefully you’ll stick along for the ride and learn some things about me.

In the theme of getting to know one another, I’m going to re-introduce myself. As in, give you my backstory, interests… just consider this an About Me page (is that a page I can already write in on wordpress? I’m trying to get the hang of this). I grew up (well, am growing up) in a strict conservative household that went to church every Sunday morning, and shamed anything out of social norms. Eventually my mom stopped going to church for reasons unknown to me, so I started going with my grandmother. These two women brought me up in my childhood home until I was 14. We weren’t poor, but we certainly weren’t well to do. We always had what was needed. I love my grandmother more than anyone on this earth. She’s like a mother to me, and even took that job while my own mother was working. My mom and dad split up right before my 5th birthday, and never were married. The real kicker is that my dad’s parents were (are) Holiness Pentecostal churchgoers, and just about shunned him once they found out I was being born. To be honest, my dad and I are like the black sheep of the family reunions because of it (and because neither of us go to church anywhere). My dad and I haven’t always had the best relationship throughout the years, but we’ve grown much closer over the past 3 years. I’ve been spending more time with him, and I don’t feel like a burden to him anymore.

During middle school my mom started dating my now stepdad. I can’t say I ever liked him after the first few visits. I wanted my mom to be happy, though, so I kept quiet. I can easily say the past 5 years have been hell for me. I won’t get too much into their relationship because it gets my blood boiling, but I’m sure I’ll have many stories about him that I’ll vent about in this blog.

I’m skipping around a bit, but stay with me here. A week after my 5th birthday, on a mother’s day, my grandfather died (my mom’s dad). A bad back surgery and a lot of esophigial problems killed him. I still miss him to this day, but he’s influenced me more than anyone else I’ve ever known. Eventually I want to get a tattoo of one of his guitar picks over my heart. He was a welder, a carpenter, a musician, and an all-around completely loved man. He’s my hero to this day, and I’ll always cherish the short time I had with him.

Now onto the present and who I am today… I’m a senior in high school, and want to become a pastry chef with every fiber of my being. I’m bisexual and have been coming out to my friends since October of last year. My family doesn’t know about my sexuality as of yet. I’m an atheist and have had atheistic beliefs for around 3 years now. I’m sure that I’ll share my ‘realization of my sexuality’ story eventually. I love reading, and the classics are my favorites along with YA fiction scattered around within it. I enjoy listening to classic rock, and one of my best-loved bands is CCR. I’m not that good at art, but I try my best. Maybe I’ll even give you guys a look into my portfolio class drawings.

Thank you for listening to me ramble on about myself and my interest. I’d love to get to know all of you, and would love if you could comment on this post telling me your own story. To all of you, let this be but an excerpt of what is to come.

 

REREADING THIS TWO YEARS AFTER POSTING: Hannah I know you think it’s the cool thing to not believe in God and all, but girl you never stopped believing. Stop lying to yourself.